kiss goodbye,

have you ever tried th taste of 'tears of joy'? have you ever tried crying but it's because you're really very happy at that moment and tears just drip down like this? i just did. over th slightest thing. but well, i'm really very happy just now. although i'm kind of sad right now, because beebee just left singapore. still got such a long way to go for today and i wonder how am i gonna survive. i've got to stand strong! i've still got seaweed ng asthina tan sheena lao rinko low and blablabla....

i woke up at around 10am + and messaged with baby for a super short period. and i fell asleep back, feeling kinda angry at him. i dont know why. maybe i'm too tired. and woke up at twelve forty plus, saw my phone, he texted me. "lohkimyan, i now going off already. not sure tomorrow can help you take books not. tomorrow come back first thing message you." and i was thinking to myself, why so early! somemore dont have th last goodbye kiss and ily? LOL. i replied him, "baby? dont think you can reply already ba. never even give me th last kisskiss and tell me woaini. :(" alot alot of things went through my mind at that moment, i thought to myself,

"if only i didnt drink till so late last night, if only i slept early last night. then i would be able to wake up early and at least message with him. if only this morning, i didnt angry at him. regretted." and blahblahblah. a lot of things. suddenly, he replied me. i was damn super happy. and tears just drop down when i dont know whyyyyy!! not just a one or two drip okay. at least also got five lor!! messaged with him quite awhile, and he told me th sweetest thing. "even though i'm at very far, but my heart is always with you." this sentence, really made my day. :)

i realized a lot of things after last night's drinking session. i dont know why. i didnt get high or drunk okay!!!

i realized, every steps we make is really very important. once wrong, everything would go onto a disaster and all. although i've regretted what i've done, but everything cant be back to how it used to be. even if so, there'll still always be a knot that cant be untied. i really regretted, but, what's th use of regretting now? what's done, cant be undone. i made th both of us turn out to be this way. i dont wanna make anymore mistake, i dont want to. although i've regretted and changed, but, still, cant be mended. everything cant go right anymore. i wanna say, i'm really sorry to those person that included in this matter.

i dont know what's happening to me. k whatever.
wishing and hoping tomorrow beebee would be able to reach tpy at before 2. and come outside school wait for me. bringing books back for me and i'll drag him out. >:

i wanna thankgod, for fulfiling my wish just now. i was hoping that he would reply for th one last time, just one, last time. and awhile more, he really did! :)

school reopening tomorrow. in school, i'll miss him damn much as well. sigh. ):

adamwong, enjoy yourself okay? i'll be missing you in singapore. t'care alright. although you told me to have fun in school tomorrow but without you, how have alot of fun? although we're in different class... ):
baby cannot go there find other girls hor. although they'll be more prettier than me or whatever, but still, cannot hor. you belongs to lohkimyan, and only lohkimyan. no one else. okay? and i know you love me alot so you bu ke yi pian zi ji LOL!!! cant get your goodnight kiss tonight, but i wont go find other people and let them kiss okay. you said you'll kill me if i do so. so ofcourse i wont la :P i love you, always. no matter what.